Wednesday, August 17, 2011
Dan’s Big Excellent Summer Vacation
As you may or may not know, Dan has been missing from our numbers for the last week or so. He has been in Virginia…well, Mexico, but he went to Virginia to get there. We thought we’d keep you up-to-date on his vacation exploits and how the band is coping in his absence.
So the monkey says, “I don’t know what it is, Doc. It started out as a wart on my ass.”
“I know you miss Dan terribly, Carissa. If it will help, I could wear his favorite hat and drink a lot of beer.”
“I miss Dan so much. He’s been gone so long. Hmmmmm. I wonder if his girlfriend is getting lonely?”
“How come I never get to travel to a third world country that’s in desperate need of an iron-fisted leader who knows no mercy?”
“Hmmm. I think her name started with a letter…”
Dan earned a little extra holiday money while in Mexico by becoming a male forearm-prostitute for rich gay monkeys.
Since Dan is out of the country, Carissa decided to eat everything that was in the bottom of his guitar case.
Dan found out that being robbed, beaten and left for dead isn’t just something that happens to him in Hollywood.
Dong’s been singing the blues since he left.
“We really miss you, Danny
As the days and weeks, they pass
Smuggle us back some marijuana
Just don’t hide it up your ass….”
“Wow, it’s so weird, trying to sing without someone constantly staring at my boobs with his tongue hanging out.”
This is how we all like to remember Dan. Drunk out of his mind a picking and fight with his own bass guitar.
“I’m just saying, things are a little up in the air right now with Dan gone. The only way to restore any kind of order is to declare martial law. I just need you to create a diversion while I beat the back of everyone’s knees with a pipe wrench.”
While relaxing on the beach, Dan spent a lot of time shading himself under one of Tina Turner’s old wigs.
This was the last place Dan was seen alive.
But luckily, he did suddenly reappear 24 hours later.
“What do you mean Dan’s in Mexico? I was just going to show him my luscious downy milk mountains. Oh well”
“Come back to us Dan. We miss you!”
Here is Discount Romance’s very first single and video. Now available on I-Tunes and Amazon!
This is their promo video.
Click this for their blog with news, demos, videos and goofy-captioned pictures of the band.
Don’t Tell Betsy’s latest single.
Here is the latest Death of the Author Brigade video.
And here’s the latest song by Death of the Author Brigade:
'Boy Next Door' is a bouncy little tune about a girl taking "Being Neighborly" to the next level. Who lives across the lawn from you?
And here is Don’t Tell Betsy’s latest video. Enjoy the spectacle.